I have finally got a lot of my blogs, posting together, without asking for help. I hate asking for help. I have always been independent and like to do things on my own. It has been very hard for me to accept help. I always feel I have to give something in return to make the scales balance again. I do not like to owe anybody. Please believe, I have asked for help, but it has always been after I have exhausted all other avenues at least 3 times. More importantly, I find when I do ask, I am always disappointed. I will usually get a yes, I can help you and the help never arrives. I listen patiently to the excuse(I forgot, “did you need it now”, etc…) look them straight in the eye and say, forget, I will do it myself. That is usually met with(ok, well good luck). I have learned to cut out the middle man and just do it myself.
Now before you ask, I have helped many people when they ask. I will go beyond and above the help that they ask for. I will also be up front and tell you when I can’t help(this usually involves money). If can’t help, I will check up on that person to see how they made out and maybe I can offer my services now. Now to be fair, I have turned down offers of help more times than I can count, but I still want you to offer. Sometimes I want you to insist(I know sounds funny doesn’t it). I will probably turn you down. If you know me, you know I would only ask because I am in dire straits. That independent streak has cause me a lot of strife, but it is my makeup.
I know it doesn’t make sense. Then again maybe it does. I will try to explain. No, I don’t need any help.